Craigslist: I love you, I love you not...

I love you…

… for finding awesome, nice, really-in-need people to buy our extra washer and dryer, and for the fact that they didn’t haggle me to death.

… for being an online site where I can browse cheap furniture to fill the voids in my home caused by going from an 1250 square foot home to a 2600 square foot home.

… for providing endless entertainment for my (childish) husband and I when we read Casual Encounters to each other in a sexy voice, just to see who breaks character first.

… for the way you provide things right when I need them, like a home last June, or a jogging stroller yesterday…

Which brings me to…..

I love you NOT…

… for allowing married to post in the personals ad seeking “discreet” second relationships. Gross.

… for The Craigslist Killer. Seriously, Lifetime Movie Network, why did you have to do that to me? Now every time I’m selling something and people are coming to look at it, I’m also acutely aware of where the nearest baseball bat/knife/heavy-object –that-I-can-turn-into-a-weapon is.

To protect the (not-so) innocent, this is not the jogging stroller in question.

… for the woman I had to deal with today RE: aforementioned jogging stroller. So here’s the backstory: I want a jogging stroller because I have some baby jiggle around the middle yet to lose, and I just moved to a street that has a butt-kicking hill that I can burn some major calories (read: I eat Nutella every day)on. So I logged onto Craigslist yesterday at work, checked under the “baby&kids” section, and VIOLA, there it was, a $30 jogging stroller.  So I text the woman who is selling it (her request, not mine… I would have rather made a phone call, but ok, jogging-stroller-owner, we’ll play it your way). She is super standoffish when I ask if she is ever in Charlottesville, and waits a full 12 hours to text me back and tell me, “You can pick it up today if you want, but I won’t hold it. It’s first-come first-served.” Which is followed two hours later by one word: “Sold.”  Um, excuse me? I know for a FACT that I responded first to your ad, since I texted you less than 30 minutes after you posted it – so have a little bit of sales integrity and don’t sell it to the first person who can get to you.  Especially since the reason I don’t have much time to work out (aka I need to be able to take my baby with me when I work out and not pay for a gym membership AND childcare at said gym) BECAUSE I WORK ALL DAY. I do not have time to drive 25 miles in the middle of the day to get your stroller. I was temped to text her right back and say, “Well that was rude of you. I was going to give you $50 for it.” Instead, I decided to take the high road and vent via this blog instead. Though I would be lying if I said I didn’t stick out my tongue at my cell phone in a not-so-nice way. 

Reflections on...

For as long as I can remember, I have kept a diary. When I was little, it was my Pocahontas diary, purple with a shiny gold lock, where I wrote mostly about things I wanted, like Barbies, and the odd times when I got mad at my mom for "loving the dog more than me" (I was a little dramatic. "Was??" says Chad). Then I got a little older, and I moved on to pretty, flowery bound journals from Barnes and Noble where I wrote about.... BOYS. In fact, I probably need to go back to my parents' house and burn some of those for the graphic descriptions of high-school make-outs they probably contain. Eek.

And then I went to college, where I discovered the beauty and the simplicity of the Moleskine Notebook (Google it!). I bought them in three packs and filled them up with song lyrics, magazine cutouts, bits of poetry (quotations and my own), movie and concert tickets, random musings, wine reviews, longer and more serious entries, and things I didn't want to forget.

I think around the time Parker was born I stopped writing so often. Apparently I had other things to do (like breastfeed every 90 minutes for SIX MONTHS). But I unearthed my last notebook (#8, covering August 2009 - the present, kinda) yesterday whilst unpacking my office, and I found some things I wanted to share.

My entry from 8/3/2010, a little more than a month before Parker was born.

Things I Want to Teach My Son
(In no particular order)

• Respect women. Women are your sisters and your partners in life.
• Stay healthy. Mind as well as body.
• Learn how to balance a checkbook the old-fashioned way. It's the key to being responsible with money.
• Don't get mad about things over which you have no control. You're predisposed to this because of your parents, unfortunately.
• The only thing you should do in excess is love others. So keep the drinking/swearing, etc. in check.
• Get the best education you can in whatever inspires you the most -- if that means a non-traditional path, that's ok.
• Listen more than you speak
• The old maxim "Never go to sleep angry" is untrue! Sometimes its good to sleep on your anger, then wake up and see if whatever you were angry about is still important
• Keep in mind that all problems are relative. When you think you have it rough, think of others who have it rougher.
• Enjoy reading for pleasure. Everyday authors are some of the best teachers out there. 
• Don't be shy.
• Don't be afraid to speak your mind, even if it means talking back to me.
• Don't be afraid to stand your ground, even if it's an adult telling you you're wrong. Gut instincts are rarely misleading.
• Trust others until they give you a reason not to.
• Have a relationship with God, in whatever form it takes.
• Try new things, but don't be reckless. You'll be able to tell the difference between what might make a great story and what might get you hurt or in trouble.
• Always forgive. Never forget. 
• Be creative. Don't always take the easy way out -- finding a new way is usually much more fun.
• Open doors for women even if they look like feminists.
• Don't pretend to be something/someone you're not for the benefit of others. 
• Follow through.
• Don't hold grudges. 
• Lean on your family when you need to. We will never walk out on you.
• Pick up after yourself, whether or not you're a guest in someone's home. 
• After you pray and talk to God, be still for a while and let Him talk to you. 

And to follow that up, my entry from 11/18/2010, in all of its sleep-deprived glory. (You'll quickly notice the difference between the two).

Reflections on pregnancy:

• First trimester is sick. Second trimester is fun. Third trimester is fat and wobbly.
• I was healthier than at any other time in my life.
• I loved the attention (weirdly enough, especially having to go to the doctor all the time). 
• Maternity clothes are ridiculously comfortable. I honestly never want to wear zip-up pants ever again.
• Everyone laughter when Juno said she was a "sacred vessel," but it's really true. Life suddenly has importance and direction, and you realize your place in the larger scheme of things. 
• Hormones RAGE for 40 weeks. Tempers flare. Tears fall. Doors slam. But it's not you that's the bitch -- it's your hormones.
• Designing a nursery is so fun. But it's easy to go WAY overboard.
• None of the old wives tricks for inducing labor work. So eff you Eggplant Parmesan.
• Being overdue is maybe the worst form of torture ever.
• Use. The. Cocoa. Butter. My spiderweb belly thanks you in advance, amen. 
• People will give you most everything you need -- so save your $$$ for diapers. No really.
• Don't eat for two or you'll blow up. Eat for one chicken and one chicken nugget. Seriously -- 200-400 extra calories per day, and most should be calcium or protein.
• If you won't feel comfortable with one of the tests (ultrasound, amnio, Down's screening, etc...) -- you have the right and the responsibility even to say "No."
• Get pedicures. Your third trimester sausage toes will thank you, as will your OB at the delivery.
• On that note -- keep downstairs trimmed up, even when you can't see it. Trust me -- it will make you feel good about yourself.
• If you crave hot wings like I did, indulge knowing you will suffer the wrath of heartburn all night long. Mmmmmmm jalapeño cheddar. 

Reflections on childbirth:

• The nurses make all the difference.
• Tell them when it hurts, and exactly where it hurts.
• Don't get lazy about pushing -- give it your full effort all the time.
• Eating is not a great idea -- but staying hydrated is a must (Recall: puking up red Jello. Chugging club soda).
• Ask all of your questions
• Do all of the exercises they tell you to do. The birthing ball is interesting. The whirlpool tub is blissful (relatively speaking...).
• Surround yourself with the people you love. It makes the pain not as painful.
• Have people bring you food the next day -- guaranteed you will be starving and will NOT want hospital meatloaf.

Reflections on early infancy:

• It's ok to be scared to death that you're doing something wrong, but rest assured that most of the time you're not.
• Sleep train ASAP. Dark = sleep, Light = play.
• For the love of God, Breastfeed!
• If you happen to cry or laugh for no good reason or your tear spout comes on and you don't know how to turn it off -- it's not you that's the basketcase, it's your hormones.
• Call your mom. 10x a day if you need to.
• Let people help you. Let people take the baby (or your husband) off your hand -- even if it's just so you can sleep, even if they are just in the next room over.
• It's ok to feel lonely when it's just you and the baby. They are basically cute blobs for the first couple months. Don't expect fun company for a while.
• Read to him -- even if it's People Magazine.
• Take too many pictures.
• Take other people's advice with a SERIOUS grain of salt (I know this seems ironic considering the point of these "reflections," but you know what I mean.)

So what do you all think of me now? :) 

Sorry for the marathon post! I promise the next one will be shorter (and not so long coming!).

The Tell-Tale Thump

So I have this headache.

Actually, it’s more like a head-thump. Literally, it feels like something is rhythmically pounding in the back of my head, right at the base of my skull.

And it’s not just a sometimes thing. It’s an all the time thing.

Poor Chad and my work wife know that when I make a certain motion with my hand (that, come to think of it, must look questionable if you don’t know what it’s about…) it means that the thumping is so bad that I can’t hear/think/do anything else.

I thought it might be caffeine-related… until I cut back my caffeine to one serving per day and the thumping didn’t stop.

So, even though I’m not a huge fan of going to the doctor…. I broke down and made an appointment. I’m going this Friday, so please y’all, pray that it’s not a brain tumor.

In the meantime, I have WebMD’d the crap out of my symptoms (well, the one overriding undeniably annoying and anti-concentrating symptom), and I’m starting to think it might be stress-related.

Wait… Me? Stressed? Naaaaaaaaah.

Today I was making mental list of all of the things that I’m mildly to majorly stressed out about, and I surprised myself with the amount of things I stress about! So here it is:

• I'm stressed about my living situation in general. As many of you know, we are in the final stages of buying a house. We are also in the final stages of finding a renter for the place we are in now. The mortgage people and the realtor and the seller always need paperwork signed and returned THAT DAY, and our landlady is a PAIN. Not to speak ill of the elderly, but if you can't remember what you tell your tenant from one day to another, you're probably too old to be a landlord. Just saying. Stress City.  
• My poor baby has been sick for WEEKS. Constant runny nose, night cough, yucky poops (sorry TMI), etc. Nurse friends -- diagnose him! I just convinced myself (another WebMD over-exertion) that he has a milk allergy, so we are trying out Soy Milk for the time being. Stress County, VA. 
• I think I overdid it with school this semester. I love my program, but with the new job, new house, new challenges with family, etc., I am finding that I cram all of my work into the weekend -- and that makes the weekend not so relaxing. Stress University. 
• My well-intentioned husband is a TERRIBLE money manager. And it stresses me out that he has all these huge, expensive (pipe) dreams for the massive renovations he is going to do to the (new, perfectly fine without renovations) house. Can't someone be practical with me?? I know it's terrible to squash his dreams, so I can't do that. I guess all I can do is vent on my blog. Stress.com.

I know that in the grand scheme of things, my problems are relatively few. However, to little old me, it seems like a lot right now. Prayers and good vibes are appreciated, people. Thanks for listening. 

"Ball. I get it."

I had a moment of panic tonight when I realized that I have not been good about writing down Parker’s words! My mom has a faded, totally 80’s, teddy bears and too much pastel calendar where she wrote down each word I learned on the day she first heard me say it, and I have…. Nothing.

I have some mom guilt about it, but this is another one of those forgotten things that I attribute to being a working mama. After working 40+ hours a week, making dinner, doing laundry, doing homework, and pinching my husband’s cute butt, I just don’t have the energy (or the memory) to write all of that down! But just for you guys, I’m going to try.

Parker’s first word, believe it or not, was “Light.” He has always been fascinated with lights and anything that lights up, so one day we heard him in the living room saying “Ba, Ba, Ba” over and over – and we realized that he was talking about the light that was on over our dining room table.

Ok, so “Ba” for “Light” isn’t a reeeeeal first word, but that was the first time that we could tell that, in his mind, he was matching what he was seeing to something he could verbalize. Which to Mommy, the English major, was, well… major!

(Confession time: His first actual real word was “Da-Da.” But I am in denial about this. Wasn’t I in labor for 21 hours?? Didn’t I have 50 stitches? Didn’t I pull the night shift until month 4 when he started sleeping through the night? Can I get a “Ma-ma”?? No.)

Since then we have also learned to say:

• Ma-Ma (thank God)
• Mimi
• Nana
• Lala (our Monday babysitter)
• ba-ba (Are you starting to see a trend with these two repeating syllable words? Yep, me too. I speak in them all day long)
• Uh-oh
• Bye-bye
• Night-Night
• Aaaaaaaaamen
• shoe
• sock
• ball
• pee-pee
• poopy (my personal favorite…especially when he pulls it out in public)
• yogurt (which is more like “yuh-guh”)
• go-go (for Goldfish)
• diaper (he says “dipey”)
• sleep sheep

And tonight, for the first time, he said “Pizza.” So. Stinking. Cute. It’s actually more like “Sa-Sa” and he sticks his tongue out at the start of each syllable. I wish I had a video.

      We also have some phrases!

• I get it
• Thank you (does my heart proud, y’all)
• Bye-bye Da-Da/Ma-Ma
• Night-Night Da-Da/Ma-Ma 

Ok, ok, I’ll stop bragging. I know he is very advanced for a 16 month old. You don’t have to tell me he’s a baby genius. (Just kidding guys! I just have some Mommy Pride over here!)

Do Good

Just a quick post to say check this out: Spiritual Gifts Test 

This is a link to a site where you can go and take a quiz and find out what your natural spiritual gifts are, so that you can be a more effective member/leader of your church/community.

Apparently I am an Exhorter and an Administrator. Here's my write-up:

Your two highest gifts:

EXHORTER: That special ability to find and communicate to others practical ways of serving God. The exhorter is a positive motivator, knowing practical Christianity will change the lives of others (Rom. 12:8; I Timothy. 4:13; Heb. 10:25).


ADMINISTRATOR: That special ability to manage human, financial, and physical resources in an efficient manner. The administrator functions by planning, organizing, leading and supervising (Rom. 12:8; I Cor. 12:28; Titus 1:5).

Do y'all think that sounds like me? I know the administrator is RIGHT on, at least. As far as the exhorter, I would consider it a HUGE compliment if someone thought I was a positive motivator. And I do think that practical Christianity can change your life! 

Now go find out what you are! 

Anyway, I hope everyone is having a happy week! This is my first five day work week since before Christmas (I am having person pity party because I know that's actually AWESOME), so by Friday afternoon I am going to be toast. Dear Team, if you are reading this, I apologize for and also do not take any responsibility for anything I might do or say on Friday after 12:30pm. Love, Megan. 

P.S. Speaking of work, I couldn't resist: 

Is this picture ironic when juxtaposed with the rest of my post? Maybe. I love Jesus, but I am also human :)